The column that struck closest to home, for me, came out on July 14 (click here). It vividly makes the point that, in caring for elderly parents, "even experts struggle." It features the story of a geriatrician and internal medicine specialist, a man who once ran a care facility for the elderly (Dr. Jerald Winakur), and his journey (with his father and the rest of his family) through this awful wilderness. He, right along with the rest of us, has been baffled and frustrated and confused by all the array of poor choices that are available within our current "health care" systems (nothing like a system at all, really, about any of it). He wrote two papers about his experience, both of them available online: “What Are We Going to Do With Dad?” and “Dad’s Legacy.” I highly recommend both papers.
As I have recounted, in this blog, the stories about the twists and turns of my mother's illness, I have sometimes been critical of various of her physicians. And my criticism has, I believe, been justified. Perhaps most important among my criticisms is my observation that the doctors involved in care for the elderly typically do a very poor job of communicating (with each other, with their patients, and with their patients' families). And, really of equal importance, there is the fact that they sometimes exhibit shocking deficits in medical knowledge about extremely significant issues in geriatric care (two examples: the assessment of dementia, and an understanding of which medications absolutely should not be used for people over 80 [NO ATIVAN!]). But one area in which I have faulted them is, perhaps, not entirely their own fault. And that is their apparent unwillingness/inability to provide answers to the basic question that all of us are desperately asking: "What on earth should I do for my mother?" After reading the essays that Dr. Winakur wrote, I understand that, just like me, they have no idea.
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